"Now Is The Time", Says Turkey Who Advises Flock To Disguise Selves As Pieces of Broccoli For Best Chances Of Survival

TOWN COMMON — Early Wednesday morning, Crackers, the turkey, stood on the town common disguised as a jumbo piece of broccoli where he advised other turkeys to “do the same before it’s too late…the time is now!”

“Let me be clear, now is the time to disguise yourselves to avoid ending up a meal on Uncle Fred’s table on Thanksgiving,” continued Crackers dead serious as turkeys and people alike gathered around him as he waddled down the sidewalk convinced he was unrecognizable even though his feet, head and feathers were completely visible.

“Hey Crackers! Halloween was last month!” heckled a turkey who looked around for an audience before saying “you’re a joke!“

Another flock member, Peppers, wasn’t quick to take up Crackers' plan calling it “lackluster” with “potentially catastrophic results”, warning others that broccoli is in fact popular, if not more so than turkey, around the holidays. “Broccoli au gratin, broccoli cheddar soup, cheesy broccoli…I mean the list really goes on,” said a concerned Peppers as he rattled off popular broccoli side dishes.

Crackers attempted to gain control of the situation like a captain of a squadron saying “I’m in charge here!…The plan will work!”

Crackers “tested” the plan by trotting around the common saying things to pedestrians like “just a piece of broccoli here out enjoying a stroll!” but after 10 minutes was taken by surprise after a woman attempted to scoop him into her purse to make a broccoli soufflé.

Crackers was seen running in circles as he attempted to karate-kick the woman’s purse into a tree while yelling to the others to try dressing as cauliflower instead.